I think it's just our nature as humans to be judgmental. We judge people who look differently, act differently, believe differently, and do differently than ourselves. Simply, that's the beauty of the world. Our differences. How boring would the world be if everyone looked, acted, believed, and did the same?
On a deeper level, we all have a story. A story that made us who we are. A story that brought us to the place we are in life. A story that defines our beliefs. It's so easy to judge people by just looking at them but we are so much more than our physical bodies.
Lisa Ling was on Oprah the other day talking about her new series on OWN called "Our America." The series showcases the stories of a transgender child, sex offenders, faith healers, drug addicts, online brides, etc. Each of these subjects is very controversial, and we can be quick to judge the people involved. Why don't we listen to their stories instead? Can't we just let our hearts ache for the ones going through hard times and be thankful our paths didn't lead us to similar situations? Can't we just be supportive? Can't we open our eyes to new ways of thinking?
Chris and I were going through some tough times in the second half of 2009, and a couple we thought were our good friends decided they weren't going to be our friends anymore because of what we were going through. I was hurt, mad, betrayed, and confused. They really didn't know the whole story about what we were going through but decided to judge us from what they did know. We have since started talking to them again but it's hard because I kind of feel like they are only "fair weather friends." That's beside the point, though. The point is, they judged us without even really knowing what was going on. And ironically, they were going through infidelity at that time but the wife had (and has) no idea.
To wrap up, I just hope that we can learn to be less judgmental of others. Even if we don't agree with the way others live their lives, it's just not up to us to determine if what they are doing is "right" or "wrong." That is up to God and only God. I hope we can just accept people for who they are, what they stand for, what they believe in, and the decisions they make, and let that be that.
One thing I've learned is we all have problems. Marriage is REAL LIFE and with that comes ups and downs. Times in the past I would look at other people's marriage and be jealous. I would see the sweetest things they would post on Facebook or blog about and think "I wish my husband did that" and stuff like that. Then I would hear some of the real stories and I realized most of them were just bragging or things aren't always what they seem. Since then, I've hardly posted anything like that because I know how it makes people feel. If Nathan does something special for me then it's for me and not to brag about. Ya know? But sometimes it's just nice to share too. A lot of people who only posts how great their lives are...really aren't that happy. Also, it sucks when friends are not really friends! I would be careful of their new friendship. I've lost some "fair weather" friends before and it's not fun. It is hard to find genuine friends!
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